50 States- Some Things Have To Go

Hi im Max. kevin and sherri are my pets. for peeple, they're pretty good. I trained them to feed me twice a day and even to pick up my poop. how funny is that?
peeple ar so stupid. They mark there terrotory in a white bowl then it whooshes away. how dum is that? the hole house and yards aren't marked by them at all. oh well, its all mine.
speaking of dum, they are talking about this trip. then they talk aboot getting rid of me. they tink iy dont understand them becase i only anser to sit and here Max. well, i just dont want them to know how smart i am or theyd have me moppin the flore insted of slepein all day.
anyway they say Iy got to go. what? How messed up is that? they been my pets for ten yeers, and things are good. Eat, sleep, poop pee and go for walks. Y mess that up?
Iy want to git the jump on them or who nows they may send me to a shelter and I been ther befor and yu anit seen stress til yu seen me in a shelter. must a sedded ten pounds a hare.
so if you'd like to b my pet- iey meen if yu'd like a nice pet, I yam avaleable. Ey can play hide an seek, an can even put up wit kids. Ey dont bark at the doorbell, becas ey no a frend is there. ey got a bladder the size of a sante bernard and never poop or pee in the howse.
they say ey cood go fer a yeer and cum bak but who nos? maybe its a trik. I dont do tiks except sit, shake, roll over an dstay. They say im prety gud on a leesh. til sum udder dawg shows then its on!
So if yu or anybodee no's someone who wants a grate dog, ey am yer dog. a good dog. ey can even blog. not bad for no upposable thums. ey jest cant figger owt spel chek.
stoopid trip.