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The Brain- or Lack Thereof







Hendertucky is a great place to run. While the entire Vegas Valley lies flat, Henderville boasts some killer hills. Yesterday I went for a run and decided to do the hill behind the house. It climbs at a steady grade toward the heavens- not long, but steep. As I turned to ascend, a twenty-something, blond, tanned, three percent body fat chick that looked like a gazelle, descended the hill. I ran upward, and realized she turned and ran behind me.
The human brain has two halves. One is the logical side, making decisions in milliseconds, truly a marvelous gift of God. It’s why we have MacDonald’s hot fudge sundaes for less than a dollar.
The other side is- well, different. Scientists and psychologists use a technical term for it, calling it the ‘stupid side.’
My mind quickly said, “You can beat this girl to the top of the hill.”
Guess which side said that?
I dug in. Head down, feet pounding, I ran up the hill.
Over my panting, I heard the gazelle behind me.
Yes!
This hill was longer than I remembered. The gates to the water towers loomed, looking like the gates to heaven. I pounded on, pushing for all I’m worth. She didn’t sound any closer. Woo hoo!
Finally, I touched the gate, turned and gasped, my hands on my knees.
The gazelle trotted up, smiled and turned down the hill. She wouldn’t blow out a candle.
My stupid brain yells, ‘Go!”
No. The logical side kicked in. Thank God.
Eventually I ran down the hill, and the gazelle smiled as she ran up the hill again.
The logical side says, “I wonder how many times she ran up that hill before I showed up?”
Well, it proved to be a great training run.
Good grief.

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